One of those Days…

Ever had one of those days where the universe is just trying to tell you something, and is shouting extremely loudly in your ear?

Okay, so maybe it started yesterday.

Yesterday, I had four tutoring appointments set up. I was late for the first one. I got distracted and turned at the wrong street, and had to backtrack across a busy street. I haven’t got all the paperwork quite right for that student yet, as he is a special education student, and apparently the paperwork is totally different. I didn’t know that at the time I was assigned him. I have to get it right by next session, as it is due the following day. I left my purse in the student’s house, but realized it before I walked out the front door.

I was late for the next appointment, which I had set up on Saturday. It was to be our first appointment, and I have been trying for over a month to get it set up, but the parent never returns my phone calls. They live in a building where the locked front door is always closed. The family never answers the phone when I call. I managed to get in the building on Saturday, knocked on the door and discovered what I think is the reason: none of the family speaks English. Or they feel they don’t speak fluently enough to be understood over the telephone. Since I came in person, we could point at calendar dates and hold up fingers to indicate times and dates. The mother told me Sunday didn’t work because she would be at work at the time I could come (in clear enough English I had no trouble understanding). Monday worked for us both.

But when I got there, the door was locked, no one came out, and no one answered the phone. I left a message. Dead end.

This at least put me back on my time schedule, and I was perfectly on time for my next appointment. I even got to play a few rounds of solitaire in the car on my assigned tutoring netbook before walking in.

My last appointment had me showing up at an apartment that was all dark. Uh-oh, I thought, not another missed appointment. But when I knocked, the family came out of the back of the house and turned on the lights. They simply hadn’t realized it had gotten dark already.

And hour and a half later, I walked back to my car, holding a pen in my hand. Odd, I realized, as I put my bag in the car. Where’s my purse? That’s where the pen belonged. I walked back to the apartment, where all the lights in the front were again off, and sure enough, I had left it there. And the family hadn’t noticed either.

Left my purse two separate places, not a good sign.

I have been thinking about taking a road trip, but know I can’t for at least a few more months as the tutoring contracts I am on have deadlines that must be met.

Today, I was late for my first appointment, because I was watching TV. Not a good sign.

I called the mother, and let her know I was running late, and she mentioned she was running late too. We still managed to get a good 45 minute session in, despite my being late.

I was on my way to my next appointment when I realized I had gone too far. I had missed my turn. I didn’t remember what my turn was supposed to be. When it got to be the time I should have been there, and I still wasn’t closer, I stopped and looked at a map. Oops, I was heading west when I should have been heading east. I called the family’s home, knowing they didn’t have a cell phone, and left a message in case they decided to go home, they knew what had happened.

When I finally got to the library, they were just getting up to leave. I apologized, they said it was fine, we had a full hour session, which meant I was there later than usual and the next student who I can’t get ahold of, still didn’t show.

Yikes! Late, getting lost, being distracted, leaving things, what on earth is my subconcious telling me?!

I think I know. This is not the life for me. As seductive as making my own schedule, calling and visiting and making appointments; creating my own lesson plans, dancing with the learning speeds of my students; as fun and interesting and never a dull moment this job experience is, it is not what I should be pursuing. And I know it. And I’m trying to tell myself that in the most obvious way possible.

Am I listening yet?

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